I’ve struggled with this post for several days. While I don’t want to appear preachy, I do want to make you think about the fact that you are building a career in a “sex, drugs and excess” industry. And while some of you may jump for joy at that fact, others of you might be just a little wary of the whole thing.
I want you all to be wary.
Wary because no matter what your personal convictions are about sex, drugs and partying, a career in the music industry is going to put them to the test. Even if you live life WAY on the edge, you’ll meet folks so far over that edge it will scare you. And if you’re conservative, you’ll be blown away by what you’ll find.
And it won’t just be fans, it’ll be other musicians and more often than not, promoters, agents and industry business people. They’ll think that the way to make you happy – and keep the money flowing into their pockets – is to give you what ever you want anytime you want it.
As Penelop Truck says in her terrific post: The ill-advised but often-sought business-trip tryst, “now I can see why affairs happen so often on business trips…there is only freedom and fun. And what does anyone want to do with freedom and fun except have sex?”
But aside from the obvious, and real dangers of a life of sex, drugs and rock-n-roll – just look at the recent debacle surrounding Anna Nicole Smith – there’s another reason for my words of caution.
As a touring musician, I lived the following scenario again and again. We’d roll into a town with our long hair, beards and rock-n-roll clothing and stand out like a sore thumb in a town full of men with short hear, clean shaven faces and Wrangler jeans and shirts. Needless to say, the women of the town didn’t give us a second look and in fact, they usually avoided us like the plague (not that we cared that much, most of us were married).
A change occured as soon as we performed on stage. Suddenly the formerly conservative, and ignorning, women all wanted to leave their men for a life on the road or a romp in the back of the bus. Sure the temptation was strong, but there was something odd about the whole thing.
There was a surrealness that I came to realize permeates this business. These women were not truly interested in us, they were interested in escaping the reality of their lives – if even for 10 or 15 minutes after the show. I saw the same thing with concert promoters, sponsors and label people. The pervasive motivation was to live in a world of freedom and fun no matter the cost.
But, there is no such thing as a life of constant freedom and fun. Living in such a world is avoiding reality, and it’s my belief that the avoidance of reality is the reason the entertainment industry is littered with the remains of people like Anna Nicole. Sure we all need an escape from time to time, but true success – the kind that we all seek – is found when we live in reality and succeed in reality.
Don’t escape reality. Drink of it deeply. Enjoy the ride and work hard for your dreams. Enjoy every little victory as a sign that you are alive and well and capable of taking on the next challenge.
